My husband has a knack for doing chores half-way. Well, let me clarify a bit…He has a different way of approaching all typical household chores, and he never hesitates to ‘teach’ me those different ways…
I suppose I first noticed this irritating tendency when I assigned my husband the impossible task of moving an empty milk carton off the counter and into the trash can during the first six months of our marriage. I have to be honest, it’s been a downhill battle since then to get my husband to finish any chore around the house.
Take for example the ever-present and always growing pile of dirty dishes in and around our sink. Contrary to my prior dish-washing experience, my husband has shown me that there are actually two ways one can approach the death-defying feat of tacking the leaning tower of dirty dishes:
Wife’s Way: Carefully remove all of the dishes from the sink, fill it with warm soapy water, and proceed to wash every single dirty dish.
Husband’s Way: Remove only the big pots and bowls from the sink, fill those with warm soapy water, while simultaneously announcing to the wife that they cannot be washed now because they need to “soak” first, followed by a not-so-convincing “I’ll do them later.”
I suppose I could move our dogs’ shedding problem next. We have two Welsh Corgi doggies who leave massive amounts of miniature white furry tumbleweeds all over our hardwood floors. And ya know what? It just so happens that there are two different approaches one can take when sweeping the house:
Wife’s Approach: Get a broom and dustpan, and proceed to go from room-to-room, moving furniture and sweeping up every last remnant of dog hair and dust.
Husband’s Approach: Get a broom and dustpan and strategically sweep up each fur ball in one key room (most often the dining room, hall way or the TV room, but never all three at the same time). This procedure is usually followed by a proud, “I swept the floors, hon. Anything else I can help with?”
Speaking of dogs…Did you know that there are two different ways to feed pets? Well, my husband demonstrates the other way on a daily basis:
‘s way: Fill up water bowls with fresh water, and fill up the food bowls with the allotted amount of food.
Husband’s Way: Throw some food in each bowl, and call it a day. Oh yeah, then the most important part is to act like you don’t know anything about why the dogs have no water when your wife asks.
When I was contemplating what life as a newlywed would be like prior to my marriage, I never in a million years realized that there would be such limitless learning opportunities. Sure, I figured my husband would introduce me to new hobbies and whatnot, but learning how to do chores in a totally different way was not something I had anticipated. Are all newlywed gals this lucky?!?!
(Can you sense the sarcasm in that last sentence?)