What NOT to Do When Throwing a Surprise Party

As many of you may know, I decided to take it upon myself to throw my husband a surprise party for his 30th birthday two weeks ago. How did it go? Well, let’s just say that after the whole fiesta went down, I was able to come up with a list of what NOT to do when throwing a surprise party…

1) Whatever you do, don’t throw a surprise 30th birthday party in the middle of August at a house that doesn’t have central air conditioning. Two letters: B.O. Nuf said.

2) And don’t assume that everyone at the party will eat…Even if you’ve taken the liberty to explicitly write on the invite that the party will be a COOKOUT. Miraculously, all of the guests will either be “on a diet” the day of the surprise party or they “already ate” before coming. Trust me. Failing to listen to this one piece of advice will save you from having enough uncooked meat and potato salad to feed the population of a small country.

3) Do not, under any circumstances, decide to plan the surprise party with your in-laws. There are two more people who have input on the agenda, menu and guest list. That’s two more opinions to deal with on every. single. aspect. And you end up with ludicrous suggestions like: We don’t really need any alcohol at the party. *Shudders*
Or…
Let’s have the birthday boy register at Home Depot.
What?!? Who registers for a surprise birthday party?!?! Not to mention, if one were to register for a surprise birthday party, wouldn’t it, in effect, be no longer a surprise?!?

4) Repeat these words: I don’t know. Again. Good. Now again. And again. And again. I want you to be VERY familiar with this phrase because it’s all you’re going to be saying the day of the party.

Nikki, where is the bug spray? Nikki, where should I hang these decorations? Nikki, where are the coolers? Nikki, do you have sunscreen? Nikki, where is the bathroom? Nikki, where can I park? Nikki, who is this person? Nikki, how old is your husband turning?

All together now: I DON’T KNOW!

5) For the love of God, make sure you have a grill BEFORE you decide on a cookout for your  surprise birthday party. Because trying to convince your husband that he really should have the grill his parents are gifting him picked out and delivered to the house by his birthday for no better reason then “because you just should” won’t work. If you don’t get the grill beforehand, you’re going to wind up in tears, while nearly blowing the “surprise” in the process. Need I mention, having the grill in place well in advance would also help you avoid creatively transporting the grill two days prior to the party.

6)Finally, when your in-laws tell you they’re going to come down a day early and stay in a hotel, make sure that they truly understand the meaning of the words: STAY IN THE HOTEL. Otherwise, you’ll find yourself struggling to form sentences when your husband asks the night before the party: “Hey hon…Why is there a car that looks exactly like my parents car parked across the street from our house with its hazards on?”

    Heed my advice you future surprise party planners, and you just might be able to pull off a better one than I did!

    About Nikki Flores

    CluelessMe.com is written by Nikki Flores, a clueless girl who lives in Littleton, Colorado and blogs about how clueless she really is when it comes to life's crazy adventures. She writes in an honest, open, and sometimes witty voice. In other words, she keeps it real, raw, and completely relatable.
    This entry was posted in Clueless Wife and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

    8 Responses to What NOT to Do When Throwing a Surprise Party

    1. EJXD2 says:

      Indeed, the golden rule of surprise party planning is one planner. Too many pots on the stove and chefs in the kitchen and all that.

    2. Rivki Silver says:

      I’m sure he still liked it, right? We are bad neighbors for not coming. But I still have jalapenos to bring over. mmmmm. fiery peppers.

    3. Nikki Flores says:

      Rivki – Yeah, he had a good time. And the best part was…He actually had NO CLUE that I had be planning it for like 6 months! =)

      Oh, and we can do jalapeno exchange whenever is convenient for you!

    4. Carly says:

      Awww but it was fun. I wish we could have made it up in time for the cookout. You could have sent leftovers home with us. I could have farmed it off on my kids.

    5. Nikki Flores says:

      Carly- You totally should have asked for the leftovers. We seriously had to throw out soooooo much of it. Oh well…

    6. frumskeptic says:

      You’re a fantastic story teller !:)

    7. Nikki Flores says:

      FrumSkeptic- Thanks! =)

    8. Elaine says:

      I would’ve been worse off – I’ve never thrown a party – it’s too much for me to handle for these reasons!!!

    Leave a Reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *